Weekend lunch Buffet for three: $45
Bike ride to theatre: $10
Gazillion Bubbles Show tickets: $123+
A look of satisfaction and sheer excitement & happiness on our princess' face:
PRICELESS!
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Date with our Princess
Fun Day Pass: $8.25 each
Weekend lunch Buffet for three: $45
Bike ride to theatre: $10
Gazillion Bubbles Show tickets: $123+
A look of satisfaction and sheer excitement & happiness on our princess' face:
Weekend lunch Buffet for three: $45
Bike ride to theatre: $10
Gazillion Bubbles Show tickets: $123+
A look of satisfaction and sheer excitement & happiness on our princess' face:
Oh, Why Can’t I Stay Bad?
With all these laws of the Universe that I have become aware of like the Law of Attraction, Law of Deliberate Creation, etc. plus my Catholic faith and the fact I have a conscience …it’s a struggle for me to stay BAD!
Yesterday, I was feeling really upset because of the grievance caused me the last week. So, I blogged about the people who wronged me in a very vindictive, mean way – I called them names and such.
But today, I felt really guilty for behaving badly. So, I deleted the vengeful blog posts in Facebook and Blogger.
But I just retaliated. I didn’t start the fight.
Oh, why couldn’t I stay bad? Why should I forgive?
IT'S SOOO NOT FAIR!
Then, it hit me: Because as humans, we are created in God’s image and likeness. Thus, I am INNATELY GOOD.
And I am truly blissful and happy because of this ...
And this ...
and lots of blessings to celebrate!
So, back to Ho'oponopono with Dr. Joe Vitale
and EFT with Brad Yates.
Yes, Joey, nothing could dampen your spirit coz you are simply Great!
Share
Yesterday, I was feeling really upset because of the grievance caused me the last week. So, I blogged about the people who wronged me in a very vindictive, mean way – I called them names and such.
But today, I felt really guilty for behaving badly. So, I deleted the vengeful blog posts in Facebook and Blogger.But I just retaliated. I didn’t start the fight.
Oh, why couldn’t I stay bad? Why should I forgive?
IT'S SOOO NOT FAIR!
Then, it hit me: Because as humans, we are created in God’s image and likeness. Thus, I am INNATELY GOOD.
And I am truly blissful and happy because of this ...
And this ...
and lots of blessings to celebrate!
So, back to Ho'oponopono with Dr. Joe Vitale
and EFT with Brad Yates.
Yes, Joey, nothing could dampen your spirit coz you are simply Great!
Share
How To Stop Cyber-Bullying!
Like I have mentioned, I was a recent victim of cyber-bullying. But unlike other victims, I stood up and fought!
I immediately reported the matter to the authorities, and within no time, through the help and expertise of my ever-loving and supportive techie husband, we were able to track the culprit down.
The real giveaway was the comment sent to my husband’s blog where the IP address of the sender was captured by our host site.
(Google map of the culprit's address who used the fictitious email of jayjay@yahoo.com)Now, we just needed to match the same with the IP address of the other messages.
I sent Facebook messages to both Lutun and Mark, baiting them to reply so I could get their IP address. With Facebook messages, the IP address is cloaked, but could easily be decoded (add me as friend and I will show you exactly how).
(This was the cloaked IP address from Facebook that we needed to decode. This was the IP address used by Lutun)Mark was sending messages from his office and the IP address did not match with the one we have on our record. Then, Lutun sent me several messages and her IP address was an exact match!
(When decoded, the IP address used was an exact match as that used in writing derogatory comments on my husband's blog)
Here are the tips that helped me tracked down the real culprit:
1. Do not delete messages. (you’d need proof)
2. Do not retaliate (to keep the messages coming).
3. Report the matter immediately to authorities.
4. Google for IP address tracking, and when you find it, map it.
5. Pay to get a detailed report on fictitious emails.
6. When you are sure, bully back (oops, that was just me being mean... lol).
Related post:
CYBER-BULLYING IS AN OFFENSE AND MUST BE STOPPED
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Long "cold" Beach, Long Island, NY
My awareness of this SPD thing was an “aha” moment for me. Now, it made sense why JM didn’t enjoy her first time on the beach.
(Train fr Penn Stn to Long Beach)
I remember my childhood days when our family would go on beach outings. It was always so full of laughter and fun. You can’t help but fall in love with the beaches in the Philippines. They’re all lovely and superb.
(Brrrrrrrrrrrrrr)
(JM was still shivering fr the cold here. Just watched her Dad making sand castle)
Oh, whatever!
What I know for sure is that we’re never going back to Long Beach. But we’ll still give NY the benefit of the doubt and try its other beaches. Sandy Hook’s next to be rated!
We planned to spend our second weekend here in NY to go to the beach. In Long Island. All of us were so excited. I was more excited for JM knowing it was her first time.
(Train fr Penn Stn to Long Beach)I remember my childhood days when our family would go on beach outings. It was always so full of laughter and fun. You can’t help but fall in love with the beaches in the Philippines. They’re all lovely and superb.
So, I had this same expectation that weekend we went to Long Beach. (It was actually my first time too, in 7 years. There were no good beaches near and around Toronto, CA, so our family vacations there were mostly sightseeing and enjoying waterparks).
Oh, boy, were we soooooo disappointed! The water was freezing cold! My husband and I were wondering the whole time if the water was coming from Alaska!
(Brrrrrrrrrrrrrr)JM was traumatized by the cold and salty water. She shivered to the bones and we had to spend the rest of the afternoon with trying to make her feel more comfy … making sand castles, digging holes, looking for starfishes and shells, anything to make her feel better.
(JM was still shivering fr the cold here. Just watched her Dad making sand castle)But now when I come to think of it, with this new SPD awareness, I remember JM playing in the sand while I was preparing our lunch, before we even went in the water. So, she made use of her hands and probably her sensory stimuli were triggered, coupled with the cold water that then led to her meltdown.
(An episode on the beach)
(An episode on the beach)Oh, whatever!
What I know for sure is that we’re never going back to Long Beach. But we’ll still give NY the benefit of the doubt and try its other beaches. Sandy Hook’s next to be rated!
My daughter has ... what?
Yesterday, I was introduced to Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD).
Sensory Processing Disorder (formerly known as "sensory integration dysfunction") is a condition that exists when sensory signals don't get organized into appropriate responses.
A friend of ours, who is an occupational therapist, commented that perhaps my 5-yr old JM has SPD. Naturally, I refused to believe the same. People here in North America tend to overreact to kids who are hyperactive, and quickly misdiagnose super hyper kids with ADD, ADHD, ABCD, or what-have-yous.
Anyways, I just know that my JM is hyper coz she’s the only girl among her brood. With 3 boys to play with at all times, she’s obviously gonna be rough and hyper as her brothers when she plays. It's just normal for her to act that way. Heck, I was the same growing up! (up till now … lol… maybe I have the disorder, too! .. haha)
Well, my occupational therapist friend showed me.
We were making Banana bread and muffins yesterday and her kids and my JM were to mix the ingredients. She noticed that JM didn’t want her hands dirty. Whenever some mixture got to her hands, she would immediately wipe it off on her shirt or go to the sink and wash. My friend told me it is one of the signs of kids having SPD.
She experimented on JM that day, giving her activities where she made use of her hands and feet, to see how JM would react. First, she asked JM (and her kids) to play with flour, and true enough, JM would always wipe off her hands after some time.
Next, she asked all the kids to go outside and walk on the grass barefooted, which JM did hesitantly, but seemed to enjoy the activity after some time. My friend told me it must be just the hands where JM is overly-sensitive. So, she asked the kids to touch the grass with their palms and do the crab walk. Again, JM’s reaction was to wipe off each time.
(She did not like the feel of the grass on her hands and legs)Then, we went back to the kitchen table and my friend gave the kids whipped cream and maple syrup to play with. It didn’t even last 5 minutes before she got up and went to the washroom to wash her hands.
(She was only using her fingertips & not letting the icky stuff get onto her palms)My friend told me that kids with SPD usually act aggressively or throw a tantrum after doing activities that trigger their sensory stimuli so I had to watch JM’s behaviour afterwards. JM seemed to be her normal self (you know, running around the house, jumping up and down the couch, crashing herself to furniture, being hyper and all that).
Later that night, I asked JM if she liked the activities coz it looked like she did, and she said she hated them and would not want to do them again.
I never thought that she may have any disorder, but as my friend explained to me, all those were signs that I had to be aware of to help JM (and my other kids) in their growing up years.
Ok. So, that was last night. Fortunately, no tantrums whatsoever.
This morning, I witnessed the after-effect.
JM had a big … no, I mean, huge … meltdown! She “woke up on the wrong side of the bed” and just all of a sudden, cried, like there was no tomorrow. I could tolerate crying if something caused it. But for no apparent reason (other than me asking her if she wanted to eat breakfast already and distracted her watching Dora), she just wailed on top of her lungs. Now that I was aware of her “disorder”, I tried comforting her, putting my arms around her and hugging her tight, which just made the wailing worst. I asked her to stop but she said she couldn’t. I don’t know if I should laugh or be mad by that reply, but I just let her be. She cried for a good half an hour (or more, I don’t really remember).
And then, she was fine. Like nothing happened. She was her old self again playing bubbles outside.
(Notice the way she's holding the bubble container w/c was a bit sandy)Perhaps, she really has this thing called SPD. Or perhaps not. Perhaps, she’s just being a kid ... a normal kid who is hyper, happy, sensitive, rough… (Heck, all my kids act the same, so now I have to deal with four of them having this disorder … I don’t know how to take it … lol)
But now that I am aware of SPD, I can make use of this knowledge to react in a more compassionate way towards my kids from now on. This can be good.
Sisterhood
In my first year in law school (MLQU), I joined Tri Delta Lex (Fraternity/Sorority) just for the fun of it. Actually, it was more for the heck of being able to brag “I belong”. Later on, I realized it was so much more than getting that kind of feeling. You see, during my time, I was the baby of the group, so all my “brothers and sisters” gave me the much needed support to survive law school.
Then, just after a semester, I had to transfer to another law school … far away from my beloved group (actually 7 hours away from them … to Saint Louis University in Baguio City). And for more than 10 years since then, I never thought I’d ever feel grateful again for being a part of the mighty Tri Delta Lex.
Until one fine day in July 2009.
We were at the NAIA airport – my husband, myself and our 5-yr old daughter, JM – excited to get on the plane to visit my Mom in Chicago. I wanted everything to go smoothly so I was doing Ho’oponopono the whole time. It’s a technique I learned from Dr. Joe Vitale and it’s perfect for people like myself who easily loses her cool. I’d definitely recommend it. Anyways, it worked perfectly because I was calm when we were told we needed to re-pack coz our luggage was overweight. I was calm when we were told that we needed to pay travel taxes because they were not included in the ticket charges.
And I was still calm when we got to the immigration booth and we were told that we needed to pay because our daughter, who is a Canadian citizen, overstayed in the country. My husband was starting to feel the pressure and was already arguing with me, but I still didn’t lose control when the officer came back and told us the amount we had to pay was over Php7,000.00.
I still was calm when we were asked to see the Officer of the Day. That’s when I reaped the rewards of Ho’opnopono. Because as we were approaching the window, I saw one of my “sisters” inside the immigration office.
To make this long story short, we got on the plane just in time with no more hassles. After more than 10 years, I get to feel once again how privileged am I to be a part of the mighty Tri Delta Lex.
Then, just after a semester, I had to transfer to another law school … far away from my beloved group (actually 7 hours away from them … to Saint Louis University in Baguio City). And for more than 10 years since then, I never thought I’d ever feel grateful again for being a part of the mighty Tri Delta Lex.
Until one fine day in July 2009.
We were at the NAIA airport – my husband, myself and our 5-yr old daughter, JM – excited to get on the plane to visit my Mom in Chicago. I wanted everything to go smoothly so I was doing Ho’oponopono the whole time. It’s a technique I learned from Dr. Joe Vitale and it’s perfect for people like myself who easily loses her cool. I’d definitely recommend it. Anyways, it worked perfectly because I was calm when we were told we needed to re-pack coz our luggage was overweight. I was calm when we were told that we needed to pay travel taxes because they were not included in the ticket charges.
And I was still calm when we got to the immigration booth and we were told that we needed to pay because our daughter, who is a Canadian citizen, overstayed in the country. My husband was starting to feel the pressure and was already arguing with me, but I still didn’t lose control when the officer came back and told us the amount we had to pay was over Php7,000.00.
I still was calm when we were asked to see the Officer of the Day. That’s when I reaped the rewards of Ho’opnopono. Because as we were approaching the window, I saw one of my “sisters” inside the immigration office.
To make this long story short, we got on the plane just in time with no more hassles. After more than 10 years, I get to feel once again how privileged am I to be a part of the mighty Tri Delta Lex.
My New Addiction
Late to bed. Early to rise. Increase in coffee consumption. Eyebags almost to my nose. Acting like a robot ... list goes on and on.
It all boils down to one conclusion: I have a new addiction and I'm not even aware of it.
Ever since I purchased my MIND MOVIE kit, I couldn't stop making movies. I made 1 for my husband (above video), myself, friends Mae, and Anna, cousin Irene, for everybody. It's so fun and easy to use even my 7-yr old JJ couldn't help making his own LOA video.
Believe me when I tell you this is so much better than Window's Movie Maker (oops, I guess it's not fair to compare since Movie Maker deals with both videos and photos as opposed to the Mind Movie software that only accepts photos).
But hey, for an amateur like me, trust me when I say this is my new bestfriend in movie making.
I guess the best part is that I get to test drive the company's Subliminal Software (which for me totally, absolutely rocks!)
Cyber-Bullying Is An Offense and Must Be Stopped!
Note: Due to Lutun Niu's obvious request (she keeps visiting my family's website and this blogsite after I have repeatedly asked that she stop), I am publishing this post I have removed last month). I told them I have forgiven them and would really like to forget about the whole incident, but constant visits from either of them to my sites make it really difficult. But just to show that I am sincere in my offer of forgiveness, I have deleted most of the original hateful, name-calling words and replaced them with #@$%^&*#.
***********************************************************************************
ORIGINAL POST (minus the name-calling)
I am writing this once again for all those who, at one point in their life, have been victimized by cyber-bullying. I posted this blog as a Note in my Facebook but somehow it got deleted. It was actually an informative type of Note on cyber-bullying but it would appear that Facebook just acted on false report without getting the facts straight. By deleting that Note, Facebook had actually sided with the bully rather than the victim who was just trying to educate people on cyber-bullying.
In any case, it just goes to show that the culprit was really guilty about what she did. I know it somehow embarrassed the culprit as I posted her photo on the note, but at least I can proudly proclaim to the whole wide world that I don't need to HIDE under fictitious accounts and email addresses just so I can bitch about something or somebody! I can do and say whatever I like about anybody and to hell with them if they do not like what I say, but I will NEVER be a coward about expressing myself and hide my real identity! Only #x$%#@ people do that, coz they are #$@*& to think they will never get caught!
So, “it is OK to flame someone on a mailing list or in a blog as long as you do it under your real name.” - quoted from Declan McCullagh
Not that I would intentionally do that. Up until last week when the malicious messages started, I had been religiously practicing Ho'oponopono and EFT.
However, I was provoked. I was minding my own business and this <#$@%&* Chinese student from NYU, whom I have never met, started lambasting me online, calling me names and such.
So, I say: If you are, or have been, a victim of cyber-bullying, DO NOT be afraid and FIGHT! There are laws and proper authorities protecting you against it!
This was how it happened: First, the #@$%&# culprit created a Facebook account under a fictitious name JOEY JACK (obviously using my name, JOEY and from my email roseJACK). This #@$&*# Chinese sent me a message, and I quote, “Ur such a bitch. You really are!”
When I first got the message, I was of course SHOCKED! I mean, me, of all people? Awwww, I always thought I am an angel??? LMAO
Nah! Just kidding! I’m far from being an angel. And I admit, I’m a mean girl and sometimes act LIKE a “bitch”. BUT! Only when injustice is done towards me and my family. I do FIGHT for my rights and privacy. Guess, you could blame it on my Law degree. As Atty. Sison often says, “Kapag May Katwiran, Ipaglaban Mo!” (“If you have a valid legal ground, fight for it!”)
Anyway, back to the story…
Like I said, I was shocked. Why? Because I DO NOT have any enemies, or at least I am not aware that I have any. Thing is, ever since I was introduced to the Law of Attraction, I have tried to live my life as peacefully and blissfully as possible. Well, naturally there would be others who might be jealous or envious of how I live my life, but not to the extent that they would send me hate mails.
So, I immediately informed my husband about the message and he said it might just be a random message. He told me about cyber-bullying that is not directed to any particular individual, but he advised me to change my passwords immediately, just in case.
Then, this @#$%&# culprit, as @#$%&# as she is, sent me a DIRECT message on my yahoo, this time using a fictitious email jayjay@yahoo.com. And not only that, she simultaneously made malicious and derogatory comments on my blog AND on my husband’s blog. She asked my husband if he knew what I did when we were apart and that I was a slut, but she kept claiming I was pretty and sexy 36-yr old. I know the messages were kinda weird and crazy – hating me and admiring me at the same time. But her obvious plot was to create trouble between me and my husband.
So, I’ve had it! I knew this #@$%&*# is looking for some trouble, and she came to the right person, because this one does NOT back out! This was not just any annoying remark that one could just forego. This was an attack on my person and reputation. And what’s worse, she’s involving my family! (I felt like Fernando Poe, Jr. in “Kapag Puno Na Ang Salop").
At first, I didn’t know it was a SHE. I thought it was a #@$%&*#, I mean, a HE. I knew because it was a New Yorker. And I only made 2 acquaintances here in NY last year when we visited – one was Zana, and the other Mark Lyon. I just know for sure it wasn’t Zana. So, I went on to investigate on the other one. (I will have a separate blog on the investigation).
What I found out was very disturbing: it was not Mark, but his Chinese fiancée named Lutun Niu.
![]()
(This was a photo of Lutun Niu she had sent Mark before they met, that Mark then attached on one of his emails to me, asking me what I thought about her. Accd. to Mark, she tries on outfits in stores and takes photos of herself. Now here's what I thought -- #@$%^&*#)
But why oh why oh why??? I do not know this $#@%^&*# and there she went sending me and my husband hateful, demeaning messages. I have not even met her, for crying out loud! So, WHY WOULD SHE DO THAT?
Of course, it’s safe to assume it was because of Mark – her ever #@$%^&*$#@%$^&*^%$#@# fiancé. He might have told her some “juicy” stories about me and him and this #$@%^&*# Chinese Lutun Niu got madly jealous!
You see, Mark lives in his own make-believe world. He weighs a ton (translation: #@$%^&*$), but thinks he’s such a good catch and women will just fall for him. His wife divorced him. When asked about why he was divorced, he’d say all sorts of stuff about the ex like she was unfaithful, etc. etc., but he would never ever point out his faults. He’d tell you stories about him dating lots of women only to find out in the end that they were all after something …legal status in the US. [Yes, people would go that low to get legalized here in US ... they would marry a #@$%^&*# just to get a green card.] Hmmm, maybe Lutun Niu is the same? After all, she’s only a student here in US. Well, if it’s true, this is a possible immigration case that needs to be closely monitored. Coz I don’t really buy that #@$%^&*$ that what they have is REAL TRUE love. I mean, come on! The guy's the size of @#$%^&*$#! (I told you, I'm mean. Just living up to my supposed reputation of being a bitch. That is just my own “bitchy” opinion.)
There was one time I borrowed his laptop and I accidentally read his message to one of his friends in FB. It said something to the effect that I did not tell him first hand that I was married. What crap! (Whenever I meet new friends, I proudly show off my family's photos, so only a &^%$ people will think I was actually misleading them to think I was single.) Who knows what else he might have told this friend or other friends of his?
But since I was then new to the Law of Attraction, I was really trying my best to be as nice as I can. I thought that maybe he needed to fill his ego because of his #@$%^&*# self-esteem brought about by his #@$%^&* . I even introduced him to Zana thinking that maybe they’d click. We were this best threesome newfound friends in the Big Apple happily enjoying each others’ company. Him giving all that he could to satisfy my whims and caprices (you know, like a #@$%^&*!) Treating us to expensive restaurants and movie shows. He'd do just about anything so he could go bragging to all his buddies that he's not such a big L after all coz he's got 2 gorgeous women as his 'girlfriends'.
Such was his nature and personality that maybe caused his #$@%^&*$ fiancée, Lutun Niu, to get jealous and do some monstrous act of bullying me online.
But she got caught with her pants down. And now I can only imagine she’s scared as hell of what I’m gonna do to her.
Absolutely Nothing! I was taught to be always kind to @#$%^&*! LOL.
Related Posts:
HOW TO STOP CYBER-BULLYING
Share
***********************************************************************************
ORIGINAL POST (minus the name-calling)
I am writing this once again for all those who, at one point in their life, have been victimized by cyber-bullying. I posted this blog as a Note in my Facebook but somehow it got deleted. It was actually an informative type of Note on cyber-bullying but it would appear that Facebook just acted on false report without getting the facts straight. By deleting that Note, Facebook had actually sided with the bully rather than the victim who was just trying to educate people on cyber-bullying.
In any case, it just goes to show that the culprit was really guilty about what she did. I know it somehow embarrassed the culprit as I posted her photo on the note, but at least I can proudly proclaim to the whole wide world that I don't need to HIDE under fictitious accounts and email addresses just so I can bitch about something or somebody! I can do and say whatever I like about anybody and to hell with them if they do not like what I say, but I will NEVER be a coward about expressing myself and hide my real identity! Only #x$%#@ people do that, coz they are #$@*& to think they will never get caught!
So, “it is OK to flame someone on a mailing list or in a blog as long as you do it under your real name.” - quoted from Declan McCullagh
Not that I would intentionally do that. Up until last week when the malicious messages started, I had been religiously practicing Ho'oponopono and EFT.
However, I was provoked. I was minding my own business and this <#$@%&* Chinese student from NYU, whom I have never met, started lambasting me online, calling me names and such.
So, I say: If you are, or have been, a victim of cyber-bullying, DO NOT be afraid and FIGHT! There are laws and proper authorities protecting you against it!
This was how it happened: First, the #@$%&# culprit created a Facebook account under a fictitious name JOEY JACK (obviously using my name, JOEY and from my email roseJACK). This #@$&*# Chinese sent me a message, and I quote, “Ur such a bitch. You really are!”
When I first got the message, I was of course SHOCKED! I mean, me, of all people? Awwww, I always thought I am an angel??? LMAO
Nah! Just kidding! I’m far from being an angel. And I admit, I’m a mean girl and sometimes act LIKE a “bitch”. BUT! Only when injustice is done towards me and my family. I do FIGHT for my rights and privacy. Guess, you could blame it on my Law degree. As Atty. Sison often says, “Kapag May Katwiran, Ipaglaban Mo!” (“If you have a valid legal ground, fight for it!”)
Anyway, back to the story…
Like I said, I was shocked. Why? Because I DO NOT have any enemies, or at least I am not aware that I have any. Thing is, ever since I was introduced to the Law of Attraction, I have tried to live my life as peacefully and blissfully as possible. Well, naturally there would be others who might be jealous or envious of how I live my life, but not to the extent that they would send me hate mails.
So, I immediately informed my husband about the message and he said it might just be a random message. He told me about cyber-bullying that is not directed to any particular individual, but he advised me to change my passwords immediately, just in case.
Then, this @#$%&# culprit, as @#$%&# as she is, sent me a DIRECT message on my yahoo, this time using a fictitious email jayjay@yahoo.com. And not only that, she simultaneously made malicious and derogatory comments on my blog AND on my husband’s blog. She asked my husband if he knew what I did when we were apart and that I was a slut, but she kept claiming I was pretty and sexy 36-yr old. I know the messages were kinda weird and crazy – hating me and admiring me at the same time. But her obvious plot was to create trouble between me and my husband.
So, I’ve had it! I knew this #@$%&*# is looking for some trouble, and she came to the right person, because this one does NOT back out! This was not just any annoying remark that one could just forego. This was an attack on my person and reputation. And what’s worse, she’s involving my family! (I felt like Fernando Poe, Jr. in “Kapag Puno Na Ang Salop").
At first, I didn’t know it was a SHE. I thought it was a #@$%&*#, I mean, a HE. I knew because it was a New Yorker. And I only made 2 acquaintances here in NY last year when we visited – one was Zana, and the other Mark Lyon. I just know for sure it wasn’t Zana. So, I went on to investigate on the other one. (I will have a separate blog on the investigation).
What I found out was very disturbing: it was not Mark, but his Chinese fiancée named Lutun Niu.
(This was a photo of Lutun Niu she had sent Mark before they met, that Mark then attached on one of his emails to me, asking me what I thought about her. Accd. to Mark, she tries on outfits in stores and takes photos of herself. Now here's what I thought -- #@$%^&*#) But why oh why oh why??? I do not know this $#@%^&*# and there she went sending me and my husband hateful, demeaning messages. I have not even met her, for crying out loud! So, WHY WOULD SHE DO THAT?
Of course, it’s safe to assume it was because of Mark – her ever #@$%^&*$#@%$^&*^%$#@# fiancé. He might have told her some “juicy” stories about me and him and this #$@%^&*# Chinese Lutun Niu got madly jealous!
You see, Mark lives in his own make-believe world. He weighs a ton (translation: #@$%^&*$), but thinks he’s such a good catch and women will just fall for him. His wife divorced him. When asked about why he was divorced, he’d say all sorts of stuff about the ex like she was unfaithful, etc. etc., but he would never ever point out his faults. He’d tell you stories about him dating lots of women only to find out in the end that they were all after something …legal status in the US. [Yes, people would go that low to get legalized here in US ... they would marry a #@$%^&*# just to get a green card.] Hmmm, maybe Lutun Niu is the same? After all, she’s only a student here in US. Well, if it’s true, this is a possible immigration case that needs to be closely monitored. Coz I don’t really buy that #@$%^&*$ that what they have is REAL TRUE love. I mean, come on! The guy's the size of @#$%^&*$#! (I told you, I'm mean. Just living up to my supposed reputation of being a bitch. That is just my own “bitchy” opinion.)
There was one time I borrowed his laptop and I accidentally read his message to one of his friends in FB. It said something to the effect that I did not tell him first hand that I was married. What crap! (Whenever I meet new friends, I proudly show off my family's photos, so only a &^%$ people will think I was actually misleading them to think I was single.) Who knows what else he might have told this friend or other friends of his?
But since I was then new to the Law of Attraction, I was really trying my best to be as nice as I can. I thought that maybe he needed to fill his ego because of his #@$%^&*# self-esteem brought about by his #@$%^&* . I even introduced him to Zana thinking that maybe they’d click. We were this best threesome newfound friends in the Big Apple happily enjoying each others’ company. Him giving all that he could to satisfy my whims and caprices (you know, like a #@$%^&*!) Treating us to expensive restaurants and movie shows. He'd do just about anything so he could go bragging to all his buddies that he's not such a big L after all coz he's got 2 gorgeous women as his 'girlfriends'.
Such was his nature and personality that maybe caused his #$@%^&*$ fiancée, Lutun Niu, to get jealous and do some monstrous act of bullying me online.
But she got caught with her pants down. And now I can only imagine she’s scared as hell of what I’m gonna do to her.
Absolutely Nothing! I was taught to be always kind to @#$%^&*! LOL.
Related Posts:
HOW TO STOP CYBER-BULLYING
I'm Sorry, Please Forgive Me, I Love You, Thank You
I admit. I was guilty.
The first time I missed my period, I knew I was pregnant. And already having 4 kids via C-section, the idea of yet another pregnancy scared the hell out of me.
I have always said I wanted 8 kids. It's true, I do ... if there is a way for my husband to carry the baby in his womb. It's the pregnancy that scares me. I don't think I could endure another one.
I could not help but have morbid thoughts about my 5th C-section: my uterus would erupt prematurely, I would bleed to death, my husband would be left behind to take care of our 4 young kids. My family would lose me!
Then the “A” word came to mind. What if?
And I got scared all over again. Morbid thoughts came to mind again, but this time on the evil procedure: something would go wrong, I would lose a lot of blood, I will die, my husband would be left behind to take care of our 4 young kids. My family would lose me!
In my mind, there was only one and the same outcome from 2 different scenarios.
And after seeing how my 9-week baby looked like on the ultrasound, I cursed myself for thinking that “A” was even an option. How could I ever? A pro-life advocate myself, I was ashamed by how badly I acted and behaved.
I then resolved to make it up to myself, my child and my family (especially my husband whom I believed got hurt the most). A child is always a blessing, whether the pregnancy was planned or not. I had to put my trust in God and go ahead with it … risks and all.
I gathered all the information I could dig on 5th C-section from the mighty internet: health forums, health sites, google, yahoo. But the best one was from my Ob-gyn. She stated matter-of-factly that this pregnancy, like all other pregnancies, carried risks and one just had to take all the necessary precautions. So, there was really nothing to worry about. And the best part was that I was not the only one in that situation. There had been others before me that delivered safely.
From then on, there was no holding back (except sharing the news to the world). I could already hear the remarks: “What?” “Again?” “Why were you not careful?” “Don’t you know it’s dangerous?” (And I could imagine the endless discussions that would go on and on behind our backs).
We’ve heard and experienced them all before when I had my 3rd and 4th children. And I refuse to allow it to happen again with this one.
Actually, I was just scared that they would echo all my fears, and I needed to be strong for my baby. So, we only shared our good news to those whom we know will rejoice. A few select people who would only say, and think, positive things about it.
The next few days went smoothly. Everybody in the family was excited to see the new baby, especially JM, our daughter. We have included him in our daily activities … playtime, story-telling and prayers. We have even planned the delivery to be in US, so my Mom could help out. We made him so much a part of our beautiful family.
A day after Valentine’s, we have decided to treat the kids to a trip to Mines View, Mansion and Wright Park. It was in Mines View that I first felt it … uneasiness, and the usual lower back ache. But this time, there was blood.
We rushed to the hospital and everything happened so quickly. The nurses and the ER doctor would not tell us anything except wait for my Ob-gyn. But the ultrasound was the ultimate shock of all: at first glance, everything seemed okay. Baby was still alive, healthy and moving normally. But he was already out of my uterus, and there was no way to put him back inside. It was devastating!
We wanted to save him but it was hopeless. Any minute the baby would be coming out and there was nothing I or anyone could do about it. And besides, I was already bleeding profusely so they needed to do what’s best and necessary.
I was put to sleep. When I woke up, it was over.
It was a boy. I was told that he was alive when he got out. But at 12 weeks, survival was impossible.
We named him Jonathan. He was brought to Mt. Province by my mother-in-law for proper burial.
We now have our own angel up in heaven. That knowledge helps to ease the pain somehow.
We would forever miss you. We love you, baby Jonathan!
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"I love my past. I love my present. I'm not ashamed of what I've had, and I'm not sad because I have it no longer". - Colette (http://www.wisdomquotes.com)
My Prayer
So, this is how it feels to lose a child. You just feel too much sorrow that no amount of comforting would do.
You’d be surprised how much could happen in a day. One minute, you’re enjoying your time with your family ...
(Taken just a few minutes before the incident)the next minute, you lose a child.
(After the procedure)Mine was just through a miscarriage. And yet, the grief is indescribable. My heart goes out to all the parents who go through similar situations.
My prayer for today:
"Thank you Lord for the experience. Thank you for our baby Jonathan.
I am not going to feel guilty anymore because I believe what happened had to happen. I trust that in Your infinite wisdom and great love for us, You willed it to happen for reasons beyond our limited understanding, but only You know. For whatever it is, Lord God, we trust that it is for Your greater glory, and we totally surrender everything to You."
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"We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey." ~Kenji Miyazawa (http://www.quotegarden.com)
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